Maybe The New Yes – Why Were Not Emergent Introduction 2

Ted Kluck is the professional writer of the duo who are attempting to critique the emergent/emerging church in the book Why Were Not Emergent (By Two Guys Who Should Be). He says that he looks the emergent part (ok so there is a dress code, or is he trying to be funny) wearing jeans and a t-shirt most days and a bunch of cool shoes that keep him on the hip! When Kluck is describing himself he says this,

 “I am thirty-one years old, married for ten years. I am not cool. I write for a living, but I don’t lie around in my boxers until noon sipping Chianti out of the bottle, waiting to feel creative. I am not on a “journey,” and my testimony is of the bland, “raised in a Christian home” variety.”

 At first glance there seems nothing wrong with this bio, but then I saw something puzzling; why would he emphatically say something like, “I am not on a journey”! What is wrong with being on a journey? Maybe he has a problem with that terminology, maybe the idea of journey scares him? I’m not sure but his insistent statement seems to come out of left field. Of coarse being someone who considers himself on a journey (it’s been a bit of a bumpy ride lately) I consider his statement very…..SAD! I know maybe he has got it all figured out and since his salvation and conversion experience rely on the predominant fact that he was “raised in a Christian home variety” he has nothing to journey to or from for that matter? I hope the answer to this will be revealed in the coming chapters but right off the bat, I am concerned over someone saying they are not on, nor interested in a journey with God!

He admits later that he thinks church could be done differently and that we should be engaging culture more as a church, but that he enjoys being in his Christian bubble with the mainstay of this bubble being his home church; coincidentally the church that Kevin DeYoung (his co-author) pastors in Lansing Michigan. He states that his church is just plain normal with bad coffee every Sunday and the same lame carpet and plastic chairs they have always had. But he loves it because of the people, and the teaching, which he says, is, “theologically significant and challenging. Spiritual meat in a world of beer, milk, and philosophical cookies.”  

I love the fact that he listens to challenging and theologically significant preaching on a weekly basis and I have no doubt they are. I think everyone should be in this kind of church. If what you hear on a weekly basis is not challenging you to be more like Jesus then you need another church, plain and simple! My concern after reading the rest of the intro by Kluck is that he feels the emerging church perhaps lacks this same significance and challenge, likening them to the philosophical cookies in the above statement. I’m actually quite certain he feels this way after reading this next part about some of his friends who don’t attend his church and he is in disagreement with

  “I have friends whom I love dearly who are making bad choices in the name of “experience”; expressing a counterfeit freedom gleaned from pages of well-meaning spiritual-journey books outlining their authors’ mistakes in all their sexy, glamorous glory. This is a book for them. I believe that there is forgiveness for all our sins, no matter how grievous the mistake but I also know, from experience, that those sins create a chasm between us and our Lord.”

 I had to read this one a few times myself. It’s clear in this statement that he doesn’t like the idea of a spiritual journey; which is why he says he is not on one, nor interested in going on one. It is also clear that he thinks emerging Christians are following a false doctrine, counterfeit to the real gospel that apparently he and his church follow and have their jell-o “nailed down” and figured out. If your on a spiritual journey as a few of his friends have admitted to Ted Kluck thinks you may be in sin and getting further away from God the farther you travel on your so called journey!

 I keep coming back to the question, “what are these guys afraid of?” Why is the idea that someone considers their spiritual life a journey such a big deal, and why is this type of lingo and spirituality enough for him to question the salvation of his friends and hundreds of thousands of believer’s worldwide?

 Lastly, the title of the introduction tells us he is concerned with the lack of certainty in the world today, and that the church seems to be adopting this ambiguity in it’s gospel message. He clearly states this here

 As a Christian man, specifically a husband and a father, I need truth. I need to worship a God who makes demands on my character, with consequences. I need to know that Christianity is about more than me just “reaching my untapped potential” or “finding the god inside of me”. I need to know that I worship a Christ who died bodily, and rose from the dead. Literally. I need to know that decision can (and should) be made based on scripture and not just experience. These are the tings that give me peace in a world of maybe.

 Does anyone notice that he seems to say, “if God is not really like I want him to be, then I’m out of this Christianity thing”. I mean who says I need to worship a god that is like this, this, and this! What if he’s not like you want him to be? I feel like at the end of this statement he is sticking his tongue out at me. NeeNerNeeNerNeeNer. Ok, maybe that was out of line, let’s get serious.

I have not read anything YET that DeYoung and Kluck are critiquing that would deny any of these statements. Now, maybe someone somewhere says something that implies this, but as far as I have read, everyone would agree that God indeed does make demands on our character. In fact reading many of the Emergent/Emerging leaders has caused me to see just how selfish of a gospel I had been following. Jesus dies for me, everything I do Jesus has a plan for and it’s a really really good one that can’t fail if you just stay in “God’s will”. Give, so that it can come back to you good measure, pressed down, shaking together, and running over…we sing songs about this stuff and it’s not at all the message of Jesus or the bible. God’s will is a good thing, but that doesn’t always mean that you will look as if your prospering or winning all of the time…Jesus died, and so did all of his apostles along with countless others throughout the ages for the name of Jesus, yet we in America preach a gospel that says pray the prayer, give to your church and God will bless your socks off and protect you from all harm and bad in this world. And if you face something just blame (opps I mean rebuke) the devil. He did it to you!!!!! I’m sorry but that gospel is crap and doomed to fail!!! More on this laterJ

And every book I have read gives plenty of scripture to emphasize their positions, therefore numerous things have been decided upon with scripture in mind by all of these guys. Yet Ted Kluck seems to imply that the emerging church thinks experience is all you need and leave the bible reading to those crazy fundamentalists!! I have never heard of such a thing in any reading I have encountered. This book and review ought to be very interesting don’t ya thinkJ

Peace

Tony

Why Were Not Emergent (By Two Guys Who Should Be) A Review

I’m not one to write a critique of anyone’s literary work, as If I have the ability to put anything into word better than those who actually write for a living. Nor do I enjoy “being the guy” who just opposes things for opposing sake. That is why I hope folks can read this and “see the other side” of things. I’m not writing about Why We’re Not Emergent (By Two Guy Who Should Be) because I consider myself an Emergent Christian, though I may come across this way because I do connect with some of the things many voices in the movement have to say. I’m writing this because I think the authors Kevin DeYoung and Ted Kluck look at things through a particular lens (as we all do) that limits their ability to see clearly what many of the writers and communicators they critique have to say. With that said, I don’t agree with everything the Emergent or emerging guys say, and some of the critique in the book may even be legitimate! I’m writing because I can’t stand it when people pluck out one or two sentences to prove their point, and fail to actually give the context of the statement that often will give their readers a better and more accurate picture of what and why something was said or written in the first place. Of coarse this context doesn’t mean that someone will agree less with the authors of Why We’re Not Emergent, in some cases it could make for more agreement; but I can’t help but think the context is left out on purpose, or because the lens out of which they peer all things in life and theology will not allow them to see the context themselves. So I will attempt to paint some context, and give my humble opinions and hopefully do some justice to the Christian thinkers that Ted Kluck and Kevin DeYoung are picking apart in their latest work! I will take a few chapters at a time and only hit on small portions of the text, as hitting on all the issues would take forever!

The introduction is broken down into two sections because Kevin and Ted write entire chapters separately in the book, so they chose to have two different intros; stated in the introductions this is done because of their different thinking and writing styles. One is a pastor and seminary trained theology guy, while the other is a professional writer of all things sports! First up is Kevin DeYoung’s intro titled Still Submergent After All These Years. It starts with some autobiographical information detailing his traditional Christian upbringing in a Dutch Reformed community and church, with parents who saw John Calvin as a “good guy” (his words not mine). He continues to make it clear his Christianity is of the reformed type even calling the doctrines of the reformed churches of unconditional election and particular redemption “glorious truths”, admitting “others may find these two truths not so glorious”. He continues to tell us about himself, the church he pastors across the street from Michigan State University in East Lansing, only to put the exclamation point of the intro at this…“you can be all things that people have labeled as emergent in it’s followers, and not be an emergent Christian”.

The next section of DeYoung’s intro is defining the people he is attempting to critique. He explains that he will use the terms emerging and emergent interchangeably because they are pretty much the same thing. And also that not everyone they will write about would actually say they are part of the emergent church, but maybe would agree to be a part of the conversation as the leaders of the movement often call it. As Kevin invests some time in telling how difficult it is no “nail down” what it is the emergent guys believe he uses the metaphor; nailing their theology down is like nailing jell-o to a wall. Cute, eh, I thought so too upon first read! But to me he seems to poke fun and criticize how difficult it is to figure out what these guys really believe often mocking the term “conversation” which is what the fellows and followettes of the emergent group intentionally decided to call the movement. But he has serious problems with this terminology and even attributes this type of unwillingness to give “it” a label or definition to a high school mentality; DeYoung says it like this,

“It’s one thing for a high school student to be in process with his theology. It’s another thing for adults to write books and speak around the world about their musings and misgivings. I agree there must be space for Christians to ask hard questions and explore the tensions of their faith, but I seriously question that this space should be hugely public were hundreds of thousands of men and women are eagerly awaiting the next book or blog or podcast arising from your faith journey”

What are they afraid of? The implication seems to be someone is high school is allowed the latitude to sort out their faith, asking hard questions etc…but once you get past high school and enter adult-hood there should be a certain concreteness to your faith? Adults should not be having these problems; this questioning and seeking is child’s play! This is not an issue any adult should be facing. And if they are, please keep it to yourself, I certainly don’t want anyone else in the known world to have any idea that someone out there in the real world is actually questioning certain aspects of their faith! God forbid!

My issue with this approach is pretty simple; if we are not constantly wrestling with our ideas of God and making them sharper and more defined no a regular basis, we are set in our ways with no room to grow? Are we then on the same path as the Pharisees were when Jesus came along in human history? In more recent history I would have hated it if Martin Luther had not been in a mode of constantly questioning and wrestling with his faith just before posting the 95 thesis to the door at Wittenberg; if he hadn’t been in a state of constant seeking and questioning maybe we would all be catholic and have that one state approved religion here in the land of the free!

Martin Luther - "I shall never be a heretic; I may err in dispute, but I do not wish decide anything finally; on the other hand, I am not bound by the opinions of men. "

Later in the intro DeYoung is consumed by the fact that there is no clear leadership or hierarchy of the thinkers that make up the emergent conversation and after naming some names of the jell-o nailees and their insistence that not one of the conversationalists speak for the entire group he says this

“Fine. But if seven men get together to respond to their critics in one article, they should at least admit they not only share much common ground, but they are also some of the lead influencers (if they can’t say spokesperson) in the conversation. Call it a friendship, or a network, or a web of relationships, but when people endorse one another’s book and speak at the same conferences and write on the same blogs, there is something of a discernible movement afoot. Let this be crystal clear, we fully understand that emergent means a hundred different things to a hundred different people.”

My thoughts…I don’t think anyone in the “conversation” would shoot down the idea that emergent is becoming a movement of sorts. Nor do I think they would deny the fact that they are leaders to a certain degree but willing to listen to any voice within reason. What they don’t want is exactly what DeYoung wants and argues for…definition. They are not interested in defining anything and setting it in stone because they have all realized the definitions they learned as kids, and even in seminaries just don’t do it for them. Definitions in religion set boundaries and by default bring limitations, and these limitations are the culprits the people in the emergent conversation are trying to do away with. After all the boundaries set by religion are the spaces they have already stepped outside of or they are toeing the line in some cases and entire books have been written in an attempt to police the fact that they have stepped out of bounds. But hey, I say the folks in the emergent movement shouldn’t be too worried, if my memory serves me correctly it was Martin Luther and some of his contemporaries that got kicked out of the church because they stepped out of bounds (set up by the church) themselves!!

There is not enough space to quote the longest run on sentence in literary history, but DeYoung tries to sum up all things emergent in one sentence and at the end states if this sentence or most of it describes you, then you might be an emergent Christian. I guess reading this sentence made me say, “maybe I am more of an emerging or emergent Christian than I thought”, but after reading the sentence again, I kind of thought, “maybe Jesus was more of an emergent Christian than he was a 21^st century evangelical or whatever. Some of the highlights (much of the sentence is clear sarcastic jargon) of his definition of an emergent Christians are

If your political concerns are poverty, AIDS, imperialism, war mongering, CEO salaries, consumerism, global warming, racism, and oppression, and not so much abortion and gay marriage;

OR

If you disbelieve in any secular-sacred divide; if you want to be the church and not just go to church; if you long for a community that is relational, tribal, and primal like a river or a garden; if you believe doctrine gets in the way of an interactive relationship with Jesus; if you believe salvation has a little to do with atoning for guilt and a lot to do with bringing the whole creation back into shalom with its maker; if you believe following Jesus is not believing the right things but living the right way;

There was so much more but that is a small sample of his definitions, and again I would say yes to many of these things; maybe not on the same level as guys in the emergent church but certainly on some levels all of the things in this sentence speak of things important to Jesus and His followers as portrayed in the scriptures. Though some of the things in this sentence are a bit sarcastic and over the top, DeYoung admits that many parts of the list describe him and Ted Kluck and their idea of Christianity as well, but he is trying to critique the few things they really disagree with…I counted 9 things in the sentence that he mentions that are akin to his theology and the way he follows Christ, so I wonder of all the things in the sentence how many does he really not connect to? I would be willing to guess that there are just a few theological doctrines DeYoung is not willing to concede to mystery and this is his real hang up with many in the emergent church. In other words, the nailing Jell-o to the wall theory really only applies to a few points of contact in the Christian doctrine that he wants nailed down before he is willing to call emergent or emerging Christians true followers of Christ. He states in his intro that he hopes his critique comes as a brother and in love; they may be his sparring partners, but they are not “bad guys” but I’m not convinced he thinks they are true Christians.

Daddy's Little Girl

Jillian is such a beautiful girl; she is a happy little girl who gets all the attention and love anyone could ask for. She is the first person we all think about in the morning, and we all want to see her bright eyes and sweet cheeks when we wake up. Myles is always talking to her, and if she cries he is right there to talk to her, hold her hand, or sing her a song. He hates to hear his little sister cry. I think even Max (the dog) gets a little nervous when she cries. He is always right there where she is and if he hears her fuss at all he starts to whine and looks around as if to say, “Would somebody do something about this”? I would say Jillian is exactly what our family needed, and I certainly hope we are exactly what she needed.

Our family has been through a lot this year, but the days that fall in between the past and the future change the feelings of the grief and magnify the memories. It’s different because the focus has changed, and we have a very high priority in our house with a new baby girl who needs us to be “in the moment”. So we do our best to soak up this moment and be right there with Jillian because she knows no other way to live. She is always in the moment. When she’s hungry, she lets you know. If the diaper is wet, she’ll clue you in, and when she is content to sit on your lap or on your shoulder she shows you just how happy she is in that moment!

 But I can honestly say that holding her makes missing Micah really easy. Oh My God, she looks so much like him. She smiles like him, cuts her eyes at you just like he did, and her sweat little cry sounds so much like his did. I sat there one night with tears in my eyes, thinking…blessing or a curse? She looks so much like someone I miss everyday; she looks exactly like a little boy whose memories can bring joy and grief in the same moment! Is this a good thing, or is it a bad thing? The answer for me was different in the first few weeks, because it was hard not to think of Micah when you held Jillian. They were born only 4 days apart. Jillian’s birthday is July 3, 2008, and Micah was born on June 29, 2007. The memories of just 1 year ago being in the hospital for over a month watching Micah fight for his life were stirring again, and it made those first weeks with Jillian very HARD! Remembering just a year ago every cry, every diaper, every spit up, and every heartbeat mattered. Life and death were before our eyes daily with Micah and now etched forever in our minds. We were all on high alert with Micah and holding him was such a prize for the whole family. So with Jillian, many of these same feelings and worries have carried over as I watch her and hold her as often as I can. With all of this emotion I carry around with me I have come to the conclusion that the blessing or cursing is in a choice.

Deut. 30:19 God says,

 “19 I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you today that I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse. Choose life so that you and your descendants may live, 20 love the LORD your God, obey Him, and remain faithful to Him. For He is your life...."

 Though the memories of Micah are fresh and real in my mind, I must choose to be in the moment for Jillian, Myles, and Shanda! And choosing to be in the moment has brought so much life into the days I spend with my family! Today I’m learning that living in the moment and bringing life to my family is a daily choice that we are all working on mastering. With things so fresh, we all miss it from time to time! I said “him” a few times when I was talking about Jillian; Myles and Shanda have both called Jillian Micah by accident, but the reality is, they are so much alike and it wasn’t that long ago Micah was with us; it has taken some getting used to! I have a feeling this likeness will never go away and she will always be the pleasant reminder of a little boy that changed all of our lives with his fight, smile, and heart; and as the birth of Jillian has impacted the Simoncini family, Micah through Jillian continues to impact our lives! Jillian is a blessing, even in her likeness to the son that I miss everyday! This day I choose to feel the grief for Micah, and see the blessing Jillian Elaine Simoncini is to my family and me!

I have realized that in every situation we can choose to make life out of it and see the blessing, or we can choose to see the death and curse in it. Today I’m choosing life! What about you?

Happy Happy...Joy Joy

Nehemiah 8:10 "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength."

Have you ever asked yourself what is The Joy of The Lord? Have you wondered where the Joy of The Lord was for you? Is it something that you can just go and get whenever you need it; maybe pick it up at the Christian bookstore, or the Church’s resource area; surely they must have it at Wal-Mart!

I know for me there are times that I am certain I’m saved, loved by God, heaven bound, but I can find no joy! So I began to study and ask God to give me some insight into what “The Joy Of The Lord” really means, and how can the Joy of God become something tangible for his followers; so bare with me as I think out loud.

First some background on the scripture in Nehemiah…the children of Israel have just been led
back to the Land of Promise by Ezra after more than 50 years of captivity in Babylon. The scripture says in Nehemiah 8:1 “this is the first day of the seventh month”. The seventh month in the Jewish calendar is Tishri and the first day of Tishri is The Feast of Trumpets or Rosh Hashanah (The Jewish New Year). Jewish tradition holds that Rosh Hashanah celebrates the anniversary of the creation of the world. The Feast of Trumpets and Day of Atonement (Yom Kippur) are the holiest days of the Jewish year. The Day of Atonement is the 10th day of Tishri or the 10th day of the seventh month! These ten days are called the Days of Awe or High Holy Days; unlike other holy days, they do not celebrate a season or historical event. This season is a time for looking inward to spiritual growth.

The Jews start the celebration of the Fall Holidays (The Feast of Trumpets and Rosh Hahanah)thirty days prior to the Feast of Trumpets. For thirty days the shofar is blown every morning in the Synagogue to remind the people that the holy days are approaching and that they should prepare themselves. Their preparation consists of confessing their sins and seeking forgiveness; this is a time of reflection, contemplation, and putting things in order and getting right their relationship with God. This would be like our typical New Years here in the American Churches…most of us make “New Years Resolutions” that resemble the Jews trying to get their relationship with God in order! Come on be honest, how many January’s are we going to start out with a fast, a pledge to read the bible through in one year with the pastor, and vow to God with a pinky swear that we will be up every morning at 5am in our prayer closet; or how about the annual pledge to have a quiet time every day for at least an hour! Okay maybe I’m the only one with quirky New Years Resolutions!

Back to our regularly scheduled program! The Feast of Trumpets (the day of our scripture in Nehemiah) is a Sabbath day so early at dawn the people gathered for the reading of the Law and begin to weep as Ezra reads from the Torah explaining and interpreting to the folks in the crowd. As they heard the word of God plainly ministered to them and interpreted by Ezra, Nehemiah, and the priests it cut through their sin; they wept and they grieved over their position before a holy God. The people see their sinfulness and inability to be right before God and when you and I get this same glimpse of our human frailty before a Holy God weeping and repentance often follow. So as the people find themselves weeping, fearful, and totally unable to do all of the things laid out in the Torah to “please God” they recognize their weakness!! Think about it…30 days prior to this, everyday, the Jews have been thinking about the things in their lives that are not pleasing to God, praying to God to search them, know them, and test them…and if he sees any wicked way in them to point it out! (Psalm 139: 23-24)

I found a more Hebraic understanding of this verse in the HCSB (Holman Christian Standard Bible) It says this “Do not grieve, because your strength [comes from] rejoicing in the Lord” Don’t you love this version! It does not deny the fact that when you’re faced with the truth of the scriptures and search deep in your soul…you come out feeling broken! It embraces the grief and adds that your grief can be overcome by joy in the fact that you are not doing this thing alone; because of grace and mercy turn to God and He Will Be Your Strength!

The prophet tells them, do not weep, and do not grieve as you hear what God has commanded you in the Torah (the way man is to live before God) your strength to overcome will be present when you rejoice in the Lord. Or maybe we can say it like this, when you are at your weakest and you find it within your soul to rejoice in a Holy, Righteous, and loving God, He will give you strength! The Lord is our strength, Jesus said when you are weak, only then are you strong! When we recognize our own weakness and lean hard into God no matter what and at all times…He gives us strength. He is our Rock, our Strong Tower, our Salvation, our Redeemer, and our Fortress!

So the Joy of The Lord IS our strength, but to make it more tangible to the believer, say it like this.

The strength of the Lord is MY joy!

Because God is strong, I can live and walk in Joy. But I must rejoice and find pleasure IN Him and then I’m strengthened. When I rejoice in Him, then I will find strength in places I never dreamed existed. Too often we throw this verse around the neck of believers and tell them to “get” the joy of the Lord, like it’s something you keep in a pocket somewhere or purchase at a store.

The Hebrew word for Rejoice is Samach, and it implies – To brighten up, cause to make blithe and gleesome, cheer up, be joyful, make merry, and cause to rejoice.

Sounds to me like "rejoicing in the Lord" puts you and me on offense! We are called to cause it (The Joy of The Lord) by rejoicing. To make it happen by cheering up!

Psalms 21:1-6

1 Lord, the king finds joy in your strength. How greatly he rejoices in your victory!

Psalms 81:1-7

Sing for joy to God our strength; Shout in triumph to the God of Jacob.

Ex 15:2-3

The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father's God, and I will exalt him. The LORD is a warrior; the LORD is his name.

1 Chronicles 16:11

Look to the LORD and His strength; seek his face always.

Psalm 18:1

I love you, O LORD, my strength.

Psalm 28:6-9

Praise be to the LORD, for he has heard my cry for mercy. The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. The LORD is the strength of his people, a fortress of salvation for his anointed one.

There are so many more but this rant must end. I hope you come to see the Joy of The Lord is not something you just go and get from the shelf. It’s not something that you get for free or comes automatic with your get in heaven free card. The joy of our God comes when you recognize your weakness, and in your up times, down times, pain, struggle, hurts, and fears you still rejoice in God alone…and He comes along side of you holding you up, giving you strength to endure anything, even death on a Roman cross!

Peace

Tony

The Pains of Child Birth

As I write this update I find myself wrestling with great emotion! Some days the emotions are pure excitement, and other times they are confusing and numbing. Nevertheless, Here we go!

The past few years have been the most difficult of my life. So many things have caused a serious stirring in my soul! The difficulty of getting pregnant as we desired to have more children. Wondering what it could be, what is wrong, why is it so hard for us to conceive when others can shake hands with their mates and they get pregnant! What is going on in Shanda’s body that causes the miscarriages? Why is it so hard for us when there are so many people who don’t want their own babies...often abusing them or worse yet, aborting them before they even get a chance to meet them! There we were crying out to God for just another little baby to have as a part of our family. Then one day that baby we prayed for, the one we so desperately wanted for years had finally come. Micah was his name and on the way! Then at 16 weeks Micah was diagnosed with a heart defect; he was born needing the most serious open heart surgery a baby could have...had the surgery; and at almost 3 months old he was recovering well or so it seemed, and then out of nowhere he got a virus, his heart was not strong enough and he was gone; taken from us on this earth! We were Crushed!

As we looked for answers and searched for God in our pain, we found ourselves crying out again! This time it was a different cry, a cry for the comfort, and strength of God in our pain. A cry for wisdom and understanding, even if that meant saying “I don’t know why”; and let me tell you, we have found more than we bargained for! But that is covered in previous blogs : )

OK, now about 2 months after Micah died, we find out we are pregnant again! No fighting or praying to get pregnant this time, it just happens! How’s that for a roller coaster ride? But the ride had really just begun as thoughts raced through our minds...what if this baby is sick too and we have caused another one of our children to suffer? Will we have to watch Myles grieve another painful lose? All he wants is to be a big brother, and he is going to be so good at it, you should have seen him with Micah! So Shanda and I got on the roller coaster one more time, we talked and we cried through so many thoughts that seemed overwhelming at times!
So we have walked through the last few months desperate to know if the baby was going to be healthy, or if were in for another long tragic chapter to our life story.

Recently Micah’s cardiologist was gracious enough to do a fetal echo cardiogram on the new baby and the news was very very good. She did a scan of the babies heart from every angle she could think of and everything looks great; she said the baby is progressing nicely. We also had another ultrasound this tuesday and saw some 4D pictures of the new baby! She has been given the name Jillian Elaine Simoncini and everything looks great!!! So we are on the long 10 week countdown to her arrival July 3rd, 2008. And the excitement has begun to mount. We are turning past the what if’s and we can finally see the what will be’s! I have begun to accept that I will soon have a “daddy’s girl” on my arm...and frankly I can’t wait! It’s funny because people give you different reactions...they look at you with those eyes and then say “your in trouble” and “just wait, girls are a nightmare”...do I need to continue. Let’s face it, we have all said things like this...but to someone who has lost a baby, and is still going through a time of grieving, I could care less. If it’s trouble I’m in for, then bring it on. Dealing with life as it comes raising a little girl is no trouble at all if you ask me. It’s what we signed up for when we decided to have children!! So Jillian is upon us and Shanda is ready to be NOT PREGNANT, and Myles is starting to look forward to having his little sister around. I would like to share some of the 4D images of Jillian with you all! Thank You for your prayers, love, and support; may God return the grace you have shown the Simoncini Family!

Control Yourself!

Do you have control over anything in your suffering?

Where do you turn when there seems to be no answer to your suffering? Whom do you ask for insight when tough times come your way? What if the answers are not what you want to hear?

Jesus prayed in the garden for the cup of suffering to pass from Him, for the cup to be removed, for His part in the redemptive story of human history to be cut from the final edition…The outlook was more difficult than He originally anticipated, and staring it in the face was entirely different than talking about it months, days, and even hours before it all commenced at the last meal with His disciples. Yet the answer Jesus received was not the one He was looking for…Jesus asked for things to change, because He wanted them to…and nothing!

So the question remains, what do you do when things happen that you never asked for, maybe you never saw this coming; certainly you asked for a change in your favor once it arrived; yet the answer you sought never comes? Jesus had a shift in His thinking after starting His prayer with “please let this cup pass from me”…He first asks for the pain and suffering to be removed…and then He postures Himself in a place so many of us today find very difficult, and even troubling…”Nevertheless, not my will but your will be done”. Jesus was essentially saying, ”ok, since things are not going to turn out like I would prefer to see them; then let it ALL happen according to your will and may you get the glory for it all”. Now keep in mind, God’s will is more than just how God wants it to be, or how God makes things to become because He is sovereign. God’s will is also a state of mind for the believer that invites God’s wisdom, His provision, and God’s glory to be revealed in the very thing you once asked God to fix. Consequently you shift diametrically into a mode that says, “OK, if not my will…then to your will and your glory may this situation be of service”! In other words, I may not agree with your answer, but I’m on board 100% for mission…operation Glory!

So do we have control over anything in our suffering? I have come to see that we have no control over the suffering; but one thing we can control is our reaction to the suffering once we are faced with it. How will you react to the pain when it comes? Our reaction is the only thing we have control over when suffering comes, and it will shape your communion with God one way or the other!

Romans 8:28 says, “We know that all things work together for Good of those who love God, those who are called according to His purpose” I used to believe that this verse meant we will have no big issues in this life, and when a trial comes it is going to be “turned around” for my good because God loves me. It was always implied I will be just fine and it may look bad, but it will soon be turned around and the situation will turn out good for me because Jesus shed His blood on the cross so that I might have an abundant life! However the continuation of this set of verses speaks of Christ’s sacrifice and how God didn’t spare even His own son…

35”who can separate us from the love of Christ? Can affliction or anguish or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written, because of you we are being put to death all day long, we are counted as sheep to be slaughtered. No, in all these things we are more than victorious through Him who loves us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels or rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will have the power to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord!”

I’ve learned that in the midst of the storm, in the middle of a crisis, and in the depths of my worst nightmare…God’s will and glory can be celebrated by His followers, but it’s up to us to point to it. My reaction to my trouble has the power to shape its outcome! If I ignore the pain and suffering or if I chose to run from God, the enemy has won and Jesus who said He had overcome the world and His sacrifice are made nothing. Yet if I choose to trust God, in the good times and in the famine…He can and will get glory from my suffering…and He will be in perfect position to carry me through it all! But it is up to me to be in position to lean on Him!

You may be feeling a little indifferent because the answer to the prayers you prayed never came. Or maybe God did answer but He just said…no? I don’t know for sure, but this one thing I do know…if you’re praying; God is listening! He loves to communicate with you more than you can imagine. I have chosen to see the creator of the universe as a guide for my family; He is the good shepherd that leads us everyday and we have decided to set our noses at his legs in our darkest hour! “Though I walk Through The Valley of The Shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me”…And secondly we recognize God as someone who understands me in my deepest despair, yet cannot let go of His hold on His glory. So may the reactions to all of our pain, sufferings, joy, and hope point to the one and only Messiah, Jesus the son of God who takes away the sins of the world, for He has overcome the world, and He is ever present with us in our darkest hour, He hold us up…one step at a time!

He Never Let’s Go!

Casting Stones Not Crowns

I have to be honest… I'm a stone chucker! I can cast stones at people with the best of 'em! I have even been the first one to throw a stone, and even the only one to throw a stone or two! I find myself in judgment of others often; and as I have judged others, God I hope and pray they are not judging me.

I tend to judge people even though I would not totally consider it judgment!!!! I mean am I really judging someone when my service at a restaurant sucks and all I do is talk bad about that person and tell everyone how much better I would be if I were waiting the table? What about on the roads of your city, do you think your driving is far superior to EVERYONE around you? Is anyone else convinced people are complete idiots (oooppps there I go judging again) when it comes to driving? What about at work, church, your kids schools, teachers, etc. The list could go on and on couldn't it? I would like to share one thought.

I find myself thinking that I'm better than others a lot. It never comes across that way because it is mostly in my head or out loud in the car when I'm by myself; occasionally when I'm with Shanda and/or Myles in the car etc. This might seem trivial and I certainly would have defended myself to the ends of the earth, but God has His own ideas. The other day I kept hearing Jesus telling the Pharisees, "He that is without sin, cast the first stone". Now Jesus said this about a woman who deserved to be stoned according to the Jewish law! In other words according to the way people were judged in Jesus day, these guys had every right to throw some stones with vicious intent! And isn't this often the case when we gripe and complain about people? Most of the time I get frustrated with a situation or someone, I do have the "right" to do so; lets face it people can't drive very well sometimes (you know who you are ?), we do get lousy service all of the time at restaurants, in drive thru's, and anywhere else you wait in a line that is way too long! The truth is everyone makes mistakes and we will be affected by the mistakes of others all the time; this would be what we call life!!! Okay back to Jesus and the woman… Jesus wasn't saying the law is wrong in it's judgment of her, he was simply saying to the accusers, okay if she is going to be stoned today for her bad deeds, lets see who can start the party, he that is without works against God's word (the Torah, the Law), go for it…you start, throw out the first pitch!

You may have heard someone say Jesus was showing this women mercy because He had the right to throw the first stone and didn't…this of coarse is true but I would add that Jesus was modeling mercy for us. Jesus said, "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy"(Matt 5:7) I believe Jesus was saying, this is how I want my followers to act…when someone deserves a good stoning, a good verbal lashing, or a good kick in the butt by telling the manager what a LOSER they are, maybe we are to listen and react to the words of Jesus. Are you perfect, do you make mistakes, have you ever had a bad day, and the way you drove, served, or treated others was seriously affected? I would assume the answer is a resounding yes! For me the past 4 months have been a little out of character for me and I'm sure I have deserved a stoning or two! And because of this time in my life God is showing me that I will never know what others are going through and I have no right to form judgments about others from one simple interaction with them! I believe there is another question Jesus would ask us. How would you like people to treat you in your worst of days? How do you want people to react to your shortcomings and bad days? Would you like someone to offer a measure of grace you didn't earn, but an offer of grace you need just because you are having a bad day, maybe a bad year, and for some a bad life! Wouldn't it be nice if during your bad day, week, or month the very people who are affected by your mistakes didn't get angry or judgmental, and they simply asked if you are okay and sincerely wanted to know if there is anything they can do for you?

I believe at the core of what Jesus is saying to us is we should not judge someone for what they do, what they say, or how they act, even if it is completely opposite to the ways of Jesus and deserving of every terrible thing you really want to say! I believe Jesus is asking us to judge others, as we want to be judged, and to offer grace to others, as we would want others to offer grace to us in our times of shortcoming! I don't know about you, but I expect people to show me grace every time I screw up!

This has become a challenge to me everyday, because like many others I have come to believe I am better than most, I have an authority on many things because I have been there and done that…so everyone should be able to figure it out like I have. And then God shows me maybe I don't have it all figured out just like I think, and maybe I need to look at others as I want them to look at me if I were in their shoes!!!! May we all be quick to hold our stones when we want to throw them most!!

Peace
Tony

Fear vs. Faith

I have heard people say that fear is the opposite of faith and probably agreed with them in principle; but recently I have been forced to face the music and ask myself…can I be afraid, and yet still have faith? Can fear and faith co-exist? So I’m asking…is it possible to have faith and yet feel fear? Here are my two or three cents, offer your thoughts if you please!

I have been reading some things lately that put it this way; “the opposite of faith is doubt.” I’m sure everyone has good reason to think in this manner, and until recently I never recognized a separation from faith in God and faith in Him doing what I think He should do! Or my faith in Him to work everything out the way I think it ought to go. So over the past few months, I began to embrace some ideas that were foreign to me; but they have caused more growth in my life with God than ever before!

An English monk said it this way, "The opposite of faith isn't doubt. The opposite of faith is certainty.”

So I have been on a journey to seek out what certainty, faith, doubt, and fear mean to you and me today in 2008! I think people often confuse certainty with faith. Let me say it this way…when you're absolutely certain, faith has left the building! When you live in certainty…you have nothing to learn. In certainty there's no mystery, no risk, no excitement, no reward, and no real joy.

The appearance of certainty can be dangerous in a life of faith. Certainty can be used as a mask; a mask for our fears, a mask for our doubts, and a mask for our pain! I have seen people hide their fears and doubts in a faith that says, “if you don’t believe God can do anything, He won’t, He can’t!” Is this the way God works? Does He only do the things we think He can do? Is God limited by my ability to believe that He can? Does God only exist, because I think He does? Think about this, and write what your thinking J

2007 was a very tough year for Shanda & me. We finally got pregnant after 2 years of trying and a miscarriage only to find out the baby had a heart condition that would kill him without open-heart surgeryL So we opted for the surgery in hopes that Micah would have the chance at a normal life after completing the 3 surgery process! After the first surgery (The Norwood) Micah was doing well one day, then out of nowhere he got a virus and his heart couldn’t fight it off, and it ended his life. Micah was gone and we had no idea what to do! Our lives had been forever changed.

What a blow! As a family we still experience the effects of this life- changing event. I’m glad to say that through it all we have come to know and understand God in a way we never dreamed possible…even if we don’t understand everything that happens to us, we have grown to know Him more! Even Myles understands that Jesus never let us go through this entire situation and we have grown to love God even more through it all! The other night while we were in bed praying, Myles asked to pray first, and he said, “dear God, please make everything with the baby go good, and the baby will be good, and even if it’s not, we love you anyway, AMEN!” (Oh, by the way we are pregnant again, but that is another blog coming soon!) Myles has never been coached by me or Shanda to say this or think this way, he has obviously been hearing us talk this through with others and thinking this through himself, because we were floored when it came out of his little 5 year old heart…Myles actually gets it, he is living through this with us, and he gets it…WOW! God is amazing.

Anyway, Shanda and I looked at each other with tears in our eyes, so proud that Myles really understood what was going on, and more importantly understood that we love Jesus, no matter what happens in this life…no matter what things look like or how we feel… Jesus is our answer! Thank you God! At that moment I could hear Jesus telling Peter,

"You are blessed, Simon son of John, because my Father in heaven has revealed this to you. You did not learn this from any human being.”(Matt 16:17 NLT) God is speaking folks…even to the hearts of young boys in Mobile Alabama!

So back to fear vs. faith. This new pregnancy (about 15 weeks) has caused me to question; even suppress the joy I feel, and the excitement I want to have! The fear is holding me back from really being “in the moment” during these first months of pregnancy. My mind races often with questions…what will happen, what will the outcome be; will this be another year of heart-ache and pain for us, and will I have to watch my wife and son mourn the loss of another brother or sister? This fear grips me sometimes and I wonder; Am I without faith? Am I not trusting Jesus? Or worse; if my fears become the facts, will this change who God is to me and my family?

Then I think of what Myles prayed, and it occurs to me, that if we had ALL the answer to what happened to Micah and all of the whys were crystal clear for the Simoncini family…faith is no longer required of us. If we have all of the answers, then faith is not important…faith is a non-issue. Faith is the absence of having all the facts, isn’t it? The substance of our hopes, and the evidence of that which we can’t see!

Faith is not exactly…normal; the bible tells us it’s a gift from God and without it, we can’t please Him. Maybe this statement is more about us NEEDING all of the answers. Maybe God is saying if you knew everything you would be God, and if you are God then did you accept the original invitation of the accuser to Adam in the garden? (Gen 3). Maybe God is saying that it is impossible to please Him without faith, because if we insist to know all of the answers before we trust…then we are actually in SIN. In other words, if you need all of the answers to take away your fears, then you may be in sin, and more importantly you may be fooling yourself that all of the answers are available to you!

Most people who propose that fear is the opposite of faith point to Mark 4:35-41 when Jesus is in the bottom of the boat, and the disciples fearing for their lives, wake Jesus and ask him if he even cares that they are all about to die!!!! Jesus reply to them is sheer brilliance! Verse 40. "Why are you so afraid? Do you STILL have no faith?"

I believe that Jesus was not trying to give them a lesson in faith and fear as opposites. I don’t think Jesus was telling them, if they had enough faith, they would be able to speak to the storm themselves, if you had enough faith you would be without fear! I believe Jesus was trying to get them to understand that He was there with them, all along. The storm was raging, and Jesus was with them, period! He was “along for the ride”…so to speak! I see Jesus telling His disciples that in their fear, and in their worse moments in life with death is at their door…Jesus is there! I think Jesus was saying, I have not let you or your ancestors out of my grip so far…why would I start now! And Jesus idea of being there is different than you might think…it’s not to always to take away the fear, the death, the pain, or the sorrow; but to comfort and bring peace in the MIDST of the storm, peace and comfort in the fight, peace and comfort in the fear! In this way, Fear gives way to the spirit of God and we can walk in peace, even when things don’t look so good! Think about it…with Him in the boat, death was not going to be so bad; Jesus is at their side and never ever letting them go, because as Paul said, “38 I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from his love. Death can't, and life can't. The angels can't, and the demons can't. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can't keep God's love away. 39 Whether we are high above the sky or in the deepest ocean, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.”(Rom 8:38-39)

Jesus wanted His disciples to understand that no matter what happens, they will never be alone, even if the boat tipped over, causing all of them to perish; He was with them through it all…and this is the faith he wanted them to have. Not the faith that says we can speak to the mountains and they MUST move; or the faith that says we can speak to the storms of life ourselves, and they HAVE to stop…but the kind of faith that says, in this storm, in this fear, in this life…Jesus IS with me, and if Jesus is with me, then who can be against me! God can and does heal; God can and does deliver, God can and does move mountains…BUT if the storm, mountain, fear, sickness, or disease remains God is still with you and me holding us up and nothing can take us form His hand! God’s love is so grand, his glory is so amazing and magnificent, that nothing can separate us from Him…not even a little fear I have when I see life in its darkest moments repeating itself!

May you learn to see God is with you always, and know that nothing can separate you from His love. In the days of plenty, and the days of famine; in your days of pleasure, and your days of misery; in your days of success and in the days of failure, God Will Never Let You Go! May we learn to see that nothing can separate us from God, He is love. May you come to understand that when He feels so far away, this is a lie of the enemy, because Jesus is in the boat with you; in the midst of your storm, He will never leave you or forsake you. And may we come to understand that faith is not about having all the answers to this life. Faith is about trusting in THE ANSWER! Jesus help us grow comfortable with not knowing or having all of the answers, and let our faith takeover and bring peace in the assurance that we know the ONE who does in fact have all the answers!

A Video Blog about Family

This video blog was played at the memorial service for Micah in Sept. 2007... the content was taken from a blog posted on Myspace this summer (2007) while sitting with Shanda, Myles, and Micah (in tummy) in the hospital in Atlanta, Ga. I spent everyday for nearly 2 months with my family; I had the time of my life! This summer I learned what being a father and a husband is all about!